Goss (gossymer) wrote,

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From Canada With E-Love (X-Men Evolution) Parts 1 to 9

Title: From Canada, With E-Love
Author: gossymer
Fandom: X-Men Evolution
Pairing(s): Mostly canon only...Lance/Kitty, Rogue/Remy, Kurt/Amara, Scott/Jean etc.
Summary: The story is based on email correspondence between various X-Men on a school trip to Canada and the remaining X-Men back at the mansion
Author's Notes: I actually wrote this a long time ago, while X-Men Evolution was still running (so its definitely mid series AU) and I was much younger. I've been getting the urge recently to have it worked over and redone and...continued. So I'm posting it to see if anyone would be interested in reading more or being a beta...

Chapter One: Ah’m Surrounded by Idiots.

From:     Rogue <gothgurl@i-dont-give-a-shit.net>

To:        Kitty <Kitty@Xavinstitute.edu>  

Sub:      Storm’s playin’ with the weather again, ain’t she?


Hey Kitty Kat,

It was nice of ya not ta come. Now ah get ta enjoy Bobby’s whinin’ about outdated technology all by mah lonesome. He snagged the PC right next ta me to wait out the flight delay.

At least Amara is there ta keep him busy. But gurl, she seriously reminds me of ya before we were roommates- too sweet fer her own good. Ah hope ah can change that on this trip;) Yah know ah’m good at corruptin’ ppl.

Ah’m dying of thirst. Bobby froze the water fountain. It almost makes me jealous that you’re stayin’. Ah swear the lady next in line couldn’t have been more pissed. She called security but we managed ta secure the net café as a hold out. She’s currently resorted ta death glares.

Don’t even get me started on the fuzzy dude an’ porcupine. They’re in an argument ‘bout which groups are ‘last millennium’ and which are still hip. Their choices still suck tho. Who likes Sugar Ray in this day and age anyway?

There’s some commotion at the gate entrance- some guy in a black trench coat. Oh gawd, the caterwauling. Ah’m getting a migrai-Kitty! It’s Evan! You should have come man, it’s gonna be sIt’s Kurt! Tell Amanda that I’ll be back in a mon

Hey, ah’m back. If Amanda asks, tell her that Kurt’s gone back to Germany will ya? Oh an’ ah just remembered. Tell Storm ta pull some strings an’ get the weather back on track. Ah hate turbulence.

And ‘bout Lance, just ‘cause the mansion’s practically empty doesn’t mean he can rock it- or you- on a daily basis, lol ;) Seriously though, if Scott comes back from Hawaii to find Lance serenading ya- from bed- I don’t like ta think ‘bout the consequences

‘Kay, ah gotta go- the planes boardin’ and the teach is callin'.

We’re goin’ on a tour of Canada!!! This had better be bettah than Logan’s memories.




Chapter Two: We should never ever get Bunnies.

From:     Rogue <gothgurl@i-dont-give-a-shit.net>

To:        Kitty <Kitty@Xavinstitute.edu>  

Sub:      uh, kitty? this isn’t rogue. it’s uh…umm…


uh kitty?

it’s jamie! now don’t freak! i’m fine! i’m with rogue-she found me! its just that i’m not in the country. could you tell professor xavier it’s probably best that i stay in canada for the holidays? please? i mean, mrs. mactaggert is pretty cool about the whole thing. she even said i could call her moira. she and hank might get on well not mr. kenner though. he looked stoned or something). since i, uh, borrowed pro

What he means ta say is since he stole the Prof’s VISA platinum, we won’t have ta worry ‘bout the money. Ah swear, that was all that saved him from sleepin’ in the hotel lounge. The guy at the counter insisted that ah pay for a separate room for him and his newly arrived ‘brothers’ Jamie had a little ‘accident’ when he was discovered). Luckily Mrs. Mo wasn’t there to see that happen. Here, the Jamies want ta talk to yah Gawd, they’re like energizer bunnies).

kitty, you won’t believe how easy it was to get here. get the card, book the ticket online and then all I had to do was sneak onto the plane. i borrowed Logan’s trench coat. please don’t tell him though. i couldn’t see in it so I cut some holes. the  lady in front of kept giving me looks. rogue says that it’s fountain lady. she says that the old bird probably thought I was trying to to

-ta feel her up. Hey, ah’m back. Jamie just turned slightly green. Ah don’t think he can write right now. Anyway, Kitty IF U DON’T TAKE JAMIE OFF MAH HANDS, AH’LL DESTROY EVERY SINGLE WALL POSTER U OWN. They’ll be in itsy bitsy pieces…here Jamie wants ta say somethin’.

i wanted to get an e-mail address. what do you think? i like rogue’s. she says anywheremail.com has a lot of great ones. i mean i need the privacy. for instance i really don’t want rogue being able to read over my shoulder, like right now.

kitty! rogue’s gone to check on the others. you know i’d do anything for you right? that you’re my favourite housemate? you have to get professor to let me stay

she’s coming back! bye





Chapter Three: An’ down she goes.

From:     Kitty <Kitty@Xavinstitute.edu>

To:         Rogue <gothgurl@i-dont-give-a-shit.net

Sub:      Great news tho not for you)


<26th October, Saturday: Morning>

Gee Rogue, thanks for giving me advanced warning. My posters are still waiting for you in my room. NOT. Oh and speaking of the Prof, I’ve got good news- for Jamie. Sorry to burst your bubble Rogue, but he thought it would be a great ‘learning experience’ for the energizer bunny!

BTW, Jamie- you’re a natural! I’ve got to hand it to you, the way you pulled the whole thing off like an X-Man. Uh, Jubes and all are still sparking about the last time you trapped them in the Danger Room. If I were you I’d stay clear of Bobby.

Still, you are NOT getting an e-mail like Rogue’s. You aren’t even allowed on anywheremail.com till you’re a teen. Trust me, just get one from Hotmail or Lycos or something.

Oh and guys, since I’m stuck here at the mansion *drum-roll* I’m starting a kid’s camp! *pause* ‘Kay, you can scrape your mouths off the floor. It isn’t *that* bad. It’s gonna finance college. Now I'm kidding! You think, I, Kitty Pryde, would start scrimping and saving in my sophomore year? Actually, I really wanted to get a gorgeous dress for the prom, but uh, it’s a tad bit over my budget. Don’t ask about the price- you’ve had way too many shocks than is healthy ;)

Anyway, the Prof’s okay with the idea of a camp ‘cept the kids will only be allowed on the grounds and not in the mansion *crosses fingers* Logan will have to put up the tents. I’ll have to get him away from his bike first- oh sorry, I meant m-o-t-o-r-c-y-c-l-e. Maybe I’ll enlist ‘Ro. Logan always seemed a bit off when the weather witch was around;)

Sam and Jubilee are all for helping- if it includes a bit of cash. I might even be able to get Fred to dress up as a clown…the powers of free food, ya know. I just might not be able to finance *that* idea though. The brotherhood tends to be slightly, uh, ‘high maintenance’.

Umm, about Lance…he’s become an occupant of sorts at the mansion *ducks death glares*. I so *sorry!*- well, actually…not. It’s just that he managed to get the flu from Storm Rogue, you seriously owe her for the blizzard). Anyway, Pietro moved Lance’s stuff in, including that of the Brotherhood- wouldn’t you know it but they wanted to play ‘nursemaid’ to him? ‘Kay, so they didn’t say it in those words but…

I really doubt I’ll ask Scott and Jean for help at the camp when they come back. Not only am I not interested in a hostile takeover but I doubt Scott will be all that willing to help when he finds Lance- who happens to be residing in his bedroom.

Oh, just remembered- Kurt had better mail me back that CD- or I’ll take your advice and Amanda will probably begin communication with GERMANY.

Luv and huggles,

^_^   ^_^   ^_^   ^_^   ^_^   ^_^

Chapter Four: Da Mallet of Death

From:     Bamf <da_fuzzy_dude@ignorance-is-bliss.net>

To:         Kitty <Kitty@Xavinstitute.edu>

Sub:      I’m never being da damn referee again.


<27th October, Sunday: Night>

Kitty, ya pointy ears elf is back. Uh, you used ta be in Hank’s Chem class, ya? Do you know how ta get da stench out of singed fur?

We had a teensy, weensy problem. Remember da blizzard? Guess where it went after the Big Apple? We vere snowbound for da whole weekend at Holiday Inn. Da tour vas delayed till after da storm cleared. So Rogue and I decided ta go tobogganing. Ve didn’t count on Amara though. Zat gurl is nuts! She saw a crocket pitch in the recreation area and suddenly she vas giving us all these puppy eyed looks. So vhat vere ve to do?

Rogue and Amara formed von team while Bobby and Evan formed da odder. Zey said I’d be best as da referee- considering zat I could bamf to either end of da field…


Everything vent vell at first. Dey planned out da course- in da form of an ‘X’ of course. Each of da teams would be placed at von end of a diagonal and dey vould have ta vork their vay across. I should have realized it vould not last.

Okay, Amara vas very good but Rogue simply use da mallet for anger management- I think she still be pissed about Lance…vat vere ya thinking anyway? I’ll be stuck doing clean up duty vhen I return. The brotherhood vill have their own personal slave! *threatens* I’m sending an e-mail to Scott.

So, as I vas saying, Rogue managed ta get her ball across da green and directly at a clown. I think that vas intentional tho- she vas muttering about da guy’s plastic smile for a vhile before the hit- and his red hair.

Da thing vas, Bobby vas a Pro- especially when he formed ice slides ta guide da ball through the loops. Sure he vas villing to play for Amara- but not so far as ta follow da rules. And since dere vas an Everquest expansion pack vaiting at da end of their course, I tended ta agree. My lips vere sealed.

It vas gonna be perfect- everyvon vas happy…till Amara came to da center loop. It vas da only von that doth da teams shared- but it vas only den zat Amara’s ball decided ta stumble, swivel, go down a slope and into da pond.  Rogue quickly noticed da wet patches and ice. I realized zat she hadn’t completely vorked out her frustration yet.

So it vas then I decided I’d ask da Professor for zat EQ game instead. Bribing can only go so far- I seriously did not vant to be sat on- I mean Evan and Bobby are my best pals but- uh- an angry Rogue and Amara…scare me.

Bobby and Evan did put up a fight. Dey noticed da gurls vere with me vhen I bamfed dem there. Bobby froze Rogue’s boots and Evan spiked the area around da ball. Unfortunately Amara got to da ball first.

Den it happened. 

She set fire to the mallet. Da thing just burst into flames. She had this grin on, worthy of Mystique. She let da mallet swing. Hard. Da ball flew straight through da spikes- and straight at me. Da thing is, everyvon saw my clothes catch fire…but the image inducer prevented dem from seeing my fur go up in flames too.

I sure felt it tho. Dey managed ta put me- I mean da fire- out but not before da hotel’s sprinklers came on. So da game vas officially over.

Everyvon vas pissed except Jamie. He’d managed to go sledging vith the other students. In fact, he sure found it funny vhen I asked Rogue for her shampoos and conditioners. Hmph. Dese ppl all laugh at da fuzzy dude.

*sigh* You think Amanda will accept collect calls from Canada?

sad and depwessed,


P.S- btw, da only CD from your room vas one of Papa Roach. I thought it vas Rogue’s. Surely it vasn’t yours- EVERYVON knows you hate da stuff, ya ? ;)

P.P.S- How do ya like da new e-mail? Rogue got us to all sign up for dem at anywheremail.com Just thought you should know.


<luv all things cute and furry. Zey make da world go round>

<A person vith a tail can be very creative…more in some places dan in odders>

<did you know? pointy ears are becoming da latest fashion trend>

<God gave man ten fingers. Six were enuf>

<Never pull da tail. I mean NEVER>

Chapter Five: Paradise- under renovation

From:     Amara <Burn_up@itshappeninghere.com>

To:         Kitty <Kitty@Xavinstitute.edu>

Sub:       Tour in Canada + Snow= Closed Attractions


<28th October, Monday: Evening>

Hi Kitty!

It’s Amara- how are you doing girl? I bet the mansion’s totally dead without us around… ‘course now that the Brotherhood’s there it’s a whole nuther story. Have battle lines been drawn yet between them and Sam and Jubes? Still, I can’t believe the professor would do something like this. Fine, Lance is kewl and okay, something of a hottie) but still- Freddy’s gonna eat yal out of the mansion.

Good luck with the kid’s camp idea- trust me when I say, you’re going to be up in enough trees that getting up in one with Lance to do *anything*, is not going to be an option. Oh, and remember- kids on sugar highs are a whole hell of a lot worse than Jubes.

Well, the tour’s really going great here…not. It’s still freezing. Jamie managed ta get everyone in the bus to sing country folk songs- before Rogue was able to squash him. I believe the asprin has become her closest companion.

The trip to Niagara Falls was a complete let down. All we did was grab some souvenirs and take some wacky photos out in the snow. Wanna know why? We managed to miss the Maid of the Mist tour. It completed its last trip while we were snowbound. And you can bet the school didn’t finance any air tours- not with all the money they’re shoveling into sports.

So we got an up close and personal view of the Falls a-la-Kurt style. I think he wanted me and Rogue to get over the crocket episode. It didn’t work though- Rogue’s cold she had been stuck in frozen boots on Sunday evening) blew up into a flu. Her face turned blotchy, her nose runny and her eyes looked suspiciously shiny.

Uh- Kurt made himself scarce for a while. He, stayed at the back of the bus on the return trip. Bobby fixed the TV and those in the bus ended up watching reruns of Scooby Doo…until I fried the power line. Accidentally, of course.

In any case I’m blackmailing Kurt to bamf me to a mall- any mall. We have to get something to cheer Rogue up. It’s more for our sake than hers- she’s behaving worse than during PMS. And that’s saying something.

Give my love to everyone back home,

Yours Truly.

P.S- Bobby can’t wait to send his digicam photos to ya. Most of them are candid- ignore those of me will ya? I wasn’t myself.


Chapter Six: The follies of the Brotherhood and co.

From:     Kitty <Kitty@Xavinstitute.edu>

To:         Amara <Burn_up@itshappeninghere.com>

Sub:       By the end of the week they are all either moving back out or dead.


<29th October, Tuesday: Morning>

Just let’s get one thing straight. MY CAMP IS NOT NAMED ‘KITTY KAT’S KIDS KAMP’. If Bobby makes any cracks I will phase through each and every electronic gadget he left here. And make a few adjustments to his danger room training sequence.

I can’t believe Maximoff and Toad-boy. All they had to do was put up a few flyers of the camp. I mean, with Pietro’s speed and Todd’s slime, how hard could it be? Too easy, I guess. The speed demon appointed himself ‘Head of Propaganda’. He then proceeded to change everything from the camp’s name to our attire. From professional Tan uniforms, we’re now ordering army outfits. I think the Speed Demon views the entire operation as a mini war on the tyranny of younger siblings. Wanda hasn’t had a good influence on him I guess.

Speaking of Wanda, she and Tabitha are redecorating Jean’s room. I’ll leave it to Jean and Scott to find out about the latest events at the Mansion themselves. From the rocking and the explosions that have been occurring in their rooms I don’t think I want to be the one to spill it.

Oh, and did you know that Kitty in Hawaiian is Kiki? It’s available on the web at alohafriends.com. I found it cute. But –uh- I told Lance, and he gave me this sympathetic look, hugged me tight and with a kiss, told me he wouldn’t tell anyone. I was kinda speechless for a while. Okay, the whole day. Lance thought I was still ‘upset’. He decided to cheer me up in the broom closet. See Amara? We didn’t need any trees ;)

Kurt, you’re right about the CD. It’s not mine. I never laid eyes on it in my life. In fact, I lost a different CD. So no biggie- let’s just keep this entire thing quiet okay? No need telling anyone at the mansion. I mean, uh, it isn’t like they’ll actually care right?

Oh guys, listen up. Logan heard ‘Ro was ill so he bought her some Chinese soup. From China. He also sat and spoon-fed her the entire thing. But I don’t think Storm liked being an invalid all that much. Later, there was a downpour while Logan was putting up the tents and mini-cabins. And to think they wonder about us.

Surprisingly, Fred turned out to be a great help. He dressed up as his version of a clown- wearing grunge and tattoos- and parked himself at the mall. He gave away balloons in the dubious shapes of flowers, animals and guns, courtesy of Pietro) and candy. He was an instant hit with the kids. *shakes head despondently* I knew TV was having a bad influence on today’s kiddies. They viewed him as something of an idol. He’s now seriously contemplating being a ‘comedian’.

I just want to just forget the whole scheme and hide under my bed.


^_^   ^_^   ^_^   ^_^   ^_^   ^_^

Chapter Seven: Picturez Imperfect

From:     Bobby <Frozen_boi@hackerz.org>

To:         Kitty <Kitty@Xavinstitute.edu>

Sub:       Dudes! Candid digicam snapshots of da week!


<29th October, Tuesday: Afternoon>

Yo Kitty- Bobby here!

Girl, you’re not gonna get any sympathy from us. How could you ever expect anything different from da BROTHERHOOD of all people? Don’t worry though: after our two weeks are up we’ll come back to sweep the jerks off their feet and out of the mansion.

BTW, Evan and I checked out da Hawaiian site. We owe you one- Kurt’s never looked so distraught until the moment we began calling him Keleka. But a cornered Kurt is a dangerous one. He resorted to choking Evan with his tail in the bus- that is, until Amara caught him at it and singed some more of his fur. The gal btw, had on a smirk worthy of Rogue.

Goth gurl meanwhile, is no longer a goth. She’s way too tired for her daily makeup routine. Rogue spent the trip curled up and asleep at the back of the bus. She looked exactly like a little kid except for the broody Marilyn Manson stuff toy Amara bought for her. In any case she’s seems pretty much, less grouchy.

Jamie’s bored out of his mind. I think he almost regrets coming- he’s got pretty much nothing to do in the bus. He grabbed a seat up front with Kurt during the trip and annoyed the hell out of blue boy. The rest of the occupants were pretty relieved he wasn’t in their vicinity.

Have you downloaded the attachments yet? I can’t wait for the rest of yal to see those pics- ‘cept don’t show them to the brotherhood will ya. I don’t think anyone- least of all Rogue- would be able to stand any cracks from them for long. Especially since the pics are all candid.

So, I managed to get the camera working by the time checked into Holiday Inn. That was about the time when Jamie tripped up his undercover act. The chaos in the first picture is basically of Rogue, strangling Jamie- who was too wrapped up in Logan’s trench coat at the time to do anything. The pile on top of her is made up of the Jamie clones. I still can’t decide if Rogue was pissed at Jamie or just using the guy as a punching bag to console herself. I think even at that moment she realized that she was stuck with him.

Jamie took the second picture. It’s obvious that Rogue’s really corrupting Amara.  Look at the girl’s expression when she had me in that headlock! It’s positively sadistic! Rogue was gleeful when she took the pic. It’s understandable though- from her POV I guess- since it was right after the crocket match. Still I didn’t think Amara would do something like that to me. I mean, it was ME after all, not your run-of-the-mill guy. I thought she, well, that she, umm…

It’s a good thing Evan went out for a pepsi. He’d kill me if he knew I was sending the next pic. It’s him with the mallet of death. Can you guess what he’s doing? That’s right- trying to get out of paying the fine. The attendant had him buy the darn thing in the end, since it was pretty much useless. Amara’s kept it as a souvenir. I bet she can’t wait to show it to yal.

The next pic is a personal fav of – oh shit scroll down to read the rest








Hey Kitty! It’s da Spykeman. Just went to get a drink but I’m back. Check out da pic I took of Kurt on Sunday night. I snuck into his bathroom and got a camera full of singed fur. He as yet hasn’t realized we were there man. Notice his gaping mouth of fanged teeth? He was too busy singing Last Resort from your Papa Roach CD. I don’t think he was ever meant for the limelight tho: the mirror shattered- granted it was due to my spikey reaction to his shrieking but still…

Heya, Bobby’s back. Whew. He didn’t scroll up. WHO’S DA MAN? BOBBY’S DA MAN! YES! ‘Kay, the last set of photos were taken on Monday’s trip to Niagara Falls. You’ve got one with Rogue in the bus. The thing underneath her is Jamie. She managed to squeeze his lungs out until he couldn’t breathe, let alone sing.

Amara took the next picture. She and I make a pretty good team, don’t we? I mean, she being a pretty good photographer and me being a pro at icing people up. Yup, the snowman in the middle is none other than Kurt. Notice the tail in the air? I didn’t have the heart to freeze his delicate pride and joy too- lol, I mean one of his pride and joys. I did freeze the other one. That’s why he doesn’t look at all happy- and rather pained. Amara took pity on him unfortunately- or fortunately if you’re Kurt. He was melted back to himself soon after the photograph. It was lucky he didn’t get the flu like Rogue though, since he basically looked like a drowned fur ball. Now, that image I really should have photographed *wistful*

I can take a joke. That’s the truth. That’s also why I’m allowing you to see the next pic. Yes, that’s me everyone is sitting on. Can’t anyone *else* take a joke- let alone admit that I am THE Iceman? It’s not fair to gang up and bury me in the snow, face down. It’s not like I froze anyon- uh- every one of them.

You can probably frame the last photo. It looks darn good. One of the Jamies took it during Kurt’s personalized tour of the Falls- don’t ask why we had Jamie bunnies bouncing around again. Just. Don’t. Ask.

So yeah, we look pretty good on the bridge right? I told you Amara and I looked good together- uh, keep that between you and me tho, kay? And Rogue was- um- she was pretty happy to be able to suspend Kurt by the tail for the photo. I’m not going to comment on the furry guy himself. Having Evan and one of the Jamies hold his legs was tolerable, but having his tail pulled… 

Anyway, I’m splitting. Evan’s trying to read the whole e-mail



Chapter Eight: Clash of the Acolytes

From:     Kitty <Kitty@Xavinstitute.edu>

To:         Rogue <gothgurl@i-dont-give-a-shit.net>

Sub:       The Midnight Mutant Convention


<30th October, Wednesday: Dawn>


Scott and Jean returned yesterday night, gorgeously bronzed and pissed. The Professor compelled them to sleep on the living room sofa-bed rather than attempt to wrest their rooms away from the ‘guests’. To say that tempers were short would be putting it lightly.

The Hit, was the icing on the cake. Sabretooth bombarded the mansion’s defenses soon after midnight. You should have seen it: the brotherhood and the X-Men all suited up and the Prof simply told us to go back into the Mansion. He simply sent a psychic blast and down went Sabretooth. I think that cat was the last straw for the Prof.

We should have realized it was too easy. While we were watching the show, Magneto got some of his new recruits to hit the mansion from the back. So we had a complete slumber party going on while yall are in Canada. Aren’t you sad you missed it?

I think not.

Jubilee and Sam were sent to the back to prevent the KKKK cabins from being destroyed- if they weren’t already. In the mansion, we tried to corner the acolytes. There were three I think.

One was having his own Guy Fawkes Day bonfire, complete with flying fire dragons and serpents. We focused our efforts on combating him and the blaze.

The other one was not a problem. I simply phased metal guy outside where Storm struck him by lightning. Being a good conductor is never beneficial to one’s health  ya know.

I didn’t actually see the last one. Logan said he was a sneaky son of a *itch tho. He managed to slash the guy before he escaped. There were scorch marks in the halls so I think the guy was a pyrotechnic.

In the end, fire guy managed to vamoose. We couldn’t blast off the tank on his back unless we wanted the mansion to go Kablooey. It was filled with gas or petrol or something to feed the flames. The guy got away while everyone was busy battling the blaze or dealing with his cronies.

Steel Guy is currently in the sickbay. He looks rather cute without the metal tho- European I think. Hank’s looking after him- and making sure he doesn’t bust out.

Lance delivered Sabretooth back to Antarctica- under the Prof’s supervision of course.

The last one managed to sneak out through the back. How he got passed Jubes and Sam, I have no idea. He snuck away through the woods. However, Logan managed to track the scent of his blood to the airport. Last we heard, Logan had boarded a plane to New Orleans.

I don’t think Magneto realized that the Brotherhood was at the mansion, let alone on our side. I mean, if it weren’t for Todd and Pietro baiting the dudes half the time, they might have actually done something serious. So we might just end up owing the brotherhood this time.

We’re currently dealing with the aftermath. The cabins weren’t touched, but most of the mansion apart from the living quarters was either smashed, scorched or simply in shambles. We did as much damage as Mag’s guys, since Wanda, Fred and Lance were especially enthusiastic to contribute. To them I bet the place looks a lot like home now.

Jean’s currently rooming with me and I’d tried so hard to prevent that from happening!) Scott sharing rooms with Lance- so technically he’s back in his own room. Do you even want to bother asking about the state of nerves over there? Last I saw Lance, he’d resorted to sleeping in the hallway.

Everyone’s currently collapsed- if Magneto decided to make a late entrance we’d probably just throw pillows at him and go back to sleep.

But since *I’m* awake, I think I’ll go splash some water on Lance. I want him to see the sunset with me on the rooftop.


Too tired to think of anything remotely funny or witty,


^_^   ^_^   ^_^   ^_^   ^_^   ^_^

Chapter Nine: The Enigmatic Chick Magnet

From:     Rogue <gothgurl@i-dont-give-a-shit.net>

To:         Kitty <Kitty@Xavinstitute.edu>

Sub:       NO SUBJECT)


<31st October, Thursday: A little before Midnight>

Hey. Something happened. Ah don’t think ah’ve completely absorbed it all but…

ah’ll just explain the whole damn thing. Then ya might understand- at least, I hope you will.

The gang spent the morning at the hotel’s indoor swimming pool and for obvious reasons, ah stayed in bed and watched TV’s Halloween specials. On returnin’ the whole lot of them announced– with mixed emotions -that there was a new guy. Moira- she’s one of the organizers- hadn’t been able ta give any official introductions yet but the kid did do some tricks in the pool for Jamie and the others.

Their reactions ta him? Jamie seemed ta have found his reason for livin’. The guy was an idol ta him or somethin’. Amara was desperate ta know the guy’s name. She said he would rate as a chick magnet on Jubilee’s scale. I guess Bobby was broodin’ ‘cause Amara liked the guy so much. Kurt simply thought he was cool and Evan couldn’t care less.

Amara couldn’t wait to point him out through the window. It didn’t matter that all ah could see was the back of his head. She kept pointin’ out his various ‘attributes’. She especially liked his accent- he was French or something.

Jamie meanwhile detailed the goddamn virtues of the guy. He tried ta demonstrate a few stunts but with, let’s just say, *different* results.

Finally ah asked whether in all this time they had bothered ta ask the guy his name?


That question shut them up. For a while.

Well, the hotel was havin’ an All Hollow’s Eve party in the evening. Bobby decided ta get the rest of the guys away from the hotel bah shoppin’ for Halloween costumes. Ah still think his main aim was ta get Amara away from his new rival.

Me? Ah spent most of my time tryin’ ta FIND my outfit. Amara had taken the liberty of puttin’ mah things in the closets when ah was ill. Do ya remember the costume? The cat burglar one? Complete with black bodysuit, gloves and tail? Ah couldn’t bring myself ta put on the headband with the cat ears though…nor the whiskers. So ah was pretty late. It was only when Kurt bamfed back- decidin’ ta go as his blue furry self- and helped ta search that ah found the getup.

You’re gonna freak when ya see Bobby’s pics of us in costume. Bobby wore a vampire outfit, with his hair slicked back and all. He looked rather kewl. Jamie ended up as Prince Charming- tho I think that was more out of desperation for a costume than anything else. He had this flashy red jacket with a foil saber. He looked surprisingly cute, which ah don’t think was his intention.

Well, Amara went as a Goth. Yup, talk about a switch in roles. She seemed pretty hyped about it. Ah can’t say ah wasn’t’ flattered. And besides, she and Bobby kinda…fitted together. Evan…Evan couldn’t find anythin’. He resorted ta going as a gangster *rolls eyes*. Ah drew some pen tattoos, which looked pretty neat if ah say so myself. There was a dragon across his arm in dark green and red.

Things at the party were as they typically are found to be: we danced for an hour or two around the pool while the older people, uh, mingled. Of course there came a time when Evan decided ta ditch us and return ta the room. Jamie also began gettin’ closer acquainted with the snacks. Kurt managed ta get away from the older women who seemed obsessed with his unique ‘outfit’. It was obvious they loved the fur…they couldn’t stop touching it! Kinky or what? Lol. Bobby dragged Amara away from her Babe-watch of French guy. After that they were pretty wrapped up in each other. It was only when Amara vacated her spot that ah got a chance to finally see what all the fuss was about.

He looked like Scott- at least at first glance. Seriously. Ah mean, which other person has brown hair and wears a pair of shades at night?

He was lookin’ straight at me across the pool. ‘Kay, so the girl he was talking to was in between the two of us, but his head was angled ta look above and right passed her, and straight at me. When the gal left he seemed ta take a step towards me- just before a smiling Snow White plopped her fat ass right next ta him. Ah was probably hallucinating. Ah think it’s a sign of mah desperateness. Ah mean, ya have Lance, Kurt’s getting Amanda and Amara is getting Bobby. Not to mention, Scott’s now taken. Who the hell is left for me? Evan and Jamie? *runs off ta jump off a cliff*

Anyway, ah asked Amara about the shades- much ta the displeasure of Bobby. It turned out the guy wore tinted goggles in the pool too. However she reminded me that not everyone’s shades hid laser beams. He probably just had an eye condition.

Hah! So Mr_I_dont_need_a_costume_for_Halloween_to_fit_in had something less than perfect!  Ah could rest easy- except for that nonchalant and completely blasé expression he always had on. The guy was…interestin’ ta say the least.

Bah the end of the party ah was bored out of mah already demented and somewhat kinky mind. Ah only took the time to tell Kurt where ah was goin’ before ah set out for the gardens. There was way too much coupling going on ta suit mah stomach. Amara and Bobby had disappeared quite some time ago. They probably had their tongues down each other’s throats. And Kurt was goin’ ta make a long distance call ta Amanda.

Ah should have known it’d be impossible ta be alone. There was a guy on the corner bench. And ah knew it was him. No ah hadn’t developed psychic powers. I just had ta ask myself which idiots on the bus played with cards. Answer: none. Plus the lamplight was glancing off of his shades. So there ya go: French guy.

Ah walked up ta him and sat down. I don’t know why. And I didn’t say a word- ‘cause I just didn’t know what ta say. I think he knew it in that enigmatic way of his. He simply shuffled his deck and then fanned them out in front of me, waiting. Ah picked one and turned it over- and smirked.

 “The Jack of Hearts. Ya play that role pretty often, huh?” Ah gave the card back and he resumed shufflin’.

“Non,” he replied with a half smile, “that’s just who you see Remy as. If it were up to me…”

Remy fanned the cards out again and pulled another out, presenting it to me.

“You’d get the King of Hearts, cheri”

Ah knew ah was goin’ red. He was flirtin’ with me. Ah sank back into the seat hopin’ he couldn’t see me. So what was ah supposed to say next? With the normal guys ah’d usually give a real snipey comment and walk off but with Remy…with Remy mah mind was blank. Ah closed mah eyes in panic. Aww, hell.

Why couldn’t ah have absorbed Kurt before comin’ here? Ah could have just bamfed out then. ‘Course with mah luck ah’d have bamfed out takin’ Remy with me, and ended up in mah bed…with him. Woah! The image….yeesh, where did that come from?


Mah eyes popped open. Remy was leanin’ towards me, with a puzzled expression. He scooted closer, nimbly pickin’ up mah tail and flickin’ it against mah cheek softly. Ah was too shocked ta respond.

“I think cher makes a very cute kitten.”

Recovering, ah raised an eyebrow, “Ah’m a cat burglar. A thief.”

“Ah, so you be wanting to steal Remy’s heart, hmm?” An eyebrow went up this time with that perpetual smirk. He was sexy but also gettin’ annoyin’ now.

“No. Just makin’ sure nobody else gets led on bah it.”

That got him slightly bugged. “I don’t lead girls on, Cherie. Dey do it ‘cause dey want to. I can’t even leave without one of dem” He paused, lookin’ pointedly at me “following me out.”

“Ah did not come here just ta be with ya!” Ah retorted, furious.

“Is that so? Well why were you staring at moi during de party?” he asked just a little hot at the edges.

“Ah wanted ta see why most of the female sex- and some of the male- were so busy drooling over ya. Ah guess ah was right. You are just a pretty face.”

Remy’s face suddenly lit up in a carefree grin and he leaned forward eagerly, “So you think I’m pretty?”

Ah couldn’t help it. A smile crept onto mah face before ah could stop it. It was weird. With anyone else ah’d probably have rolled mah eyes but, ah don’t know, he just seemed so adorably sexy. Damn.

It was then, as we silently formed a link of sorts that ah heard voices comin’ towards us. Turnin’ mah head ah saw Kurt and Jamie over Remy’s shoulder, walkin’ around unsteadily. Their voices seemed rough against the silence.

“Did ya see her face? We’ve got to send Kitty da picture before she can delete it,” Kurt gave a whoop.

“Bobby didn’t even – *hic* -realize. He just went back to kissing her!” Jamie’s voice slurred.

“Oh mah god, they’re drunk!” ah whispered.,

“Thanks Cherie, for pointing out de obvious”

Ah closed mah eyes for a second to let it sink in. They had had punch bowls at the party. PUNCH BOWLS. Are the hosts ASKING for someone to spike the drinks?

*Thump* Ah opened mah eyes to find Kurt amidst several Jamies.

“Aw, shit. Mutants.”

If ah hadn’t been so close ah wouldn’t have heard Remy’s words. For a second ah was in shock but then…

“Mutants?” Ah whispered weakly. Kurt and the Jamies made no move ta get up, but Remy still maneuvered us further into the darkness.

“Oui. Uh- we have special powers. Don’t worry, I’ll take care of dem two.” He stated simply, lookin’ back at the guys’ crumpled forms. Ah grabbed his arms.

“Remy, what do ya mean bah ‘we’?” Ah whispered.

He froze for a second. Then he flashed me a cocky smile. He shrugged and slipped his glasses off slightly.

He had red eyes. Ah mean the irises were red. Ya know, like ah have green eyes, he had red eyes.

Hell he was sexy.

Remy pulled away and turned towards the guys. He got out his cards. I doubted he was gonna show them tricks. I had ta stop him.

“Remy!” Ah tugged at his sleeve. Ah think mah panic must have been obvious.

“One moment…Cherie.” As he looked into mah eyes ah got lost in his. All ah remember was his liquid red eyes. His breath on mah lips. His-

“Remy will be back.” He turned back towards the guys. His deck began to glow pink. It hummed with energy.

It was then ah did it. Ah jerked him back ta me and-

And ah kissed him.

- Rogue.



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